im a bastard...

martial arts has been a very important part of my life and cos of that i became a different person. more humble? more disciplined? or even stronger. but i also became more afraid of losing, especially to the people around me.

my BROTHER, wei jian quitted his taekwondo trainings in pursuit of chinese martial arts. thought i was playing a good guy by introducing him the good martial arts schools. we went to visit quite a lot of different schools of different styles, one of which being very similar to my school, except its cheaper and nearer.

wei jian told me he wanted to learn under the same martial art as me, so i thought that would be a good choice? i was wrong. he wanted to be in the same school as me. fear overcame me. yes. i want him to be good. but im scared of him being better than me in my training place. i wanted to be the best, at least in my own school?

realised i was terribly wrong, sms-ed wei jian and asked him if he wanted to join my sch. he said no, and that going to the other sch will be happier for everyone. hope he'll join me, or else my conscience will prick me forever if he regret later.

if i cant even treat my bro the way i should, shouldn't i be doubting my own character?